The Hymen and The Cherry Popper

I had my first real boyfriend when I was sixteen, and before him I never did ANYTHING sexually. We were fooling around one night and he started “fingering me” with two fingers and he was going way, way up there, and very hard too. It was quite painful for me, I had never been touched before. I went to bed and in the morning when I went to the bathroom I noticed I was bleeding a tiny bit, but it wasn’t period blood. It was a much lighter red, almost pink, and kind of brown too. It didnt smell, look, or feel like my period. I figured maybe he scratched me with his fingernail or something. Turns out I spotted this pink blood on and off for almost a week! I didnt worry about it though. After time passed, I decided I was ready to have sex with him. He didn’t know I was a virgin so I was extremely nervous, and anxious to see his face when there was blood all over his sheets. We had sex, and suprisingly it didn’t hurt one bit, and I didnt bleed a drop. Does this mean my boyfriend at the time “popped my cherry” when he was fingering me for the first time?

Response from Dr. Pinhas

It always amuses me when  a young guy uses his fingers in  his girlfriend’s vagina, as if this is “the way” to orgasmic pleasure and delight for her. Unfortunately most young   “not yet”  orgasm seeking women find the “fingering experience” dreadful– more akin to a guy  “greasing” a automotive valve with his fingers.  Was he in mad pursuit of your cervix? Is he studying gynecology?  LOL .  To be serious for a moment… as a general rule, the center for orgasm in women is their clitoris. ( This is a topic for another blog). Guys have this up and down thing going on for themselves with their penises and they assume that the up and down ( or more aptly put, “in and out”) thing is the way a woman wants to be pleasured.  This is an error “oneness”. We are not all the same and what works for a guy  masturbatorily, doesn’t necessarily work for a girl.   But I am digressing here.  Because he used two fingers and was fairly vigorous, he indeed did ” pop your cherry”. (One thin finger being respectful, or a tampon won’t abuse hymenal tissue).   He inadvertantly pushed your sensitive hymenal tissue against the vaginal introitus which caused a “light pink watery” discharge that may last for a few days. Hymenal tissue never disappears but creases back.  You are right –you were cherry popped by the famous fingers. If sexual intercourse wasn’t a tad uncomfortable, one can conclude that you didn’t have to contend with the sexual intercourse discomfort brought on by the pressure of the hymen pushing back.  This leads us to a more interesting question about what consititues virginity?  Does she need a hymen to be a virign? What if she was born without hymenal tissue or is a mad gymnast/skilled equestrian, is she a virgin? If she is sexually stylized but never has had sexual intercourse, is she a virgin? Anyone out there have a perspective on the meaning of virginity?